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The three Ds
by Rob Noble

The biggest takeaway from studying personality should be not just the knowledge of our type structure and characteristics, but mainly the reminder of what we already knew – that Self-Awareness is absolutely critical to helping us to be the best versions of ourselves and to help our relationships and our world be a better place.

Knowledge of our type structure – our main type, plus the connected types, being stress and relax types and wings and all their characteristics, including both gifts and challenges, is great, but is useless unless we pay attention! If we are not aware (paying attention) we are on auto-pilot and most of our “decisions” are taken unconsciously. You know it – when “our lights are on, but no-one is home.”
All of us spend lots of time on auto-pilot – it’s easy to just rely on our habits and automatic impulses to get through each day. The problem is, if we aren’t aware, or awake, one or more of the challenges of our type structure can take hold without us noticing and toss us around as though we are a puppet being controlled by a puppet master. Call it the puppet master of personality, if you like.

So, how do we take more control of our lives? Practising regular meditation is a fabulous start. So, to is getting regular exercise and rest. As well, you can try the practice of the Three Ds.

Try a check-in with yourself at least six times each day. Perhaps first thing, when you wake up, even before getting out of bed. Then, over breakfast, while exercising, while driving to work or getting ready for the day ahead. Then, whenever you can – morning tea time, in between meetings, emails, or phone calls and lunch time, etc.

Check in with your mind and thoughts. Anything troubling me there? Let’s say “no” for now. Move on.

Check in on your feelings. Anything troubling me there? Let’s say “no” for now. Move on.

Check in on your gut instincts. Anything troubling me there? Let’s say “no” for now. Move onto whatever you were about to do.

However, if the answer is “yes”. Stop and consider whether there is anything at all you can do about this troubling thing.

If the answer is “yes” DO IT! (That’s the first “D”)

If the answer is “Yes”, but you can’t do it straight away (maybe you’re in the shower, or driving?) Diary it asap to do later. (That’s the second “D”)

If the answer is “No”, you’ve realised there’s nothing at all you can do about it. Dump it!! (That’s the third “D”). Decide to Dump it no matter how big an issue it is.

Dumping it is easier said than done. One way is to give IT an interesting name – let’s say, “Aloysius”, or “Genevieve” (apologies to the Aloysius’ and Genevieves out there) and tell it to “Get lost - You are focussing instead on something else that is at least productive and useful”. Put your attention on that thing. Your energy will follow your attention and you will then be there, in the midst of dealing with that other, productive thing for the time being.

If the troubling thing comes back to bite you later and it probably will, go back to “Plan A”. Tell it to get lost - you are dealing with something else now. Then repeat as necessary.

You will gradually find that the troubling thing will lessen its pervasive power over you and you will at least be more productive and spend less time and energy worrying about things you cannot control. Let go. Let go. Let go.

This is a great way to improve your self-awareness and focus..


Rob Noble 2019
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